Tuesday, September 19, 2017

You think is new...

The situation I am living right now, talking about the abuse, the bullying I was into, my "inestability" as in moving from one place to another is not new.

For 10 years of my life I lived a situation I could not control, and when I say I could not control,
For me is I could not explain.

The man I was with starting taking me with doctors whom provided harsh drugs, the one who talked was him, I was paralized, due his behavior he would not work, or leave my house, when I say my house is because I was paying the rent, food and all that a house is like Electrocity.

He started forcing me economically, the drugs he gave me did not allowed me to go out of bed as early as him, but I had to get up to pack your Mexican Dresses or look for another seamstress, as sometimes seamstresses when looking at my websites and ideas would want to take advantage of in many ways as I was alone and no one would take "care" of me.

What I wanted them to understand is I did not need anyone to take care of me
My education the heritage my father left me was enough to take care of my self.

But coping with an abuser was not into my father plans nor into mine, I left Hermosillo Sonora to stay away from that and found my self in a place lacking of culture appreciation
And willing to abuse from others.

I was tired of been controled, economically, of the threats he made,
After the consecuenses of his decisions, the abortion, he told his family and friends
And my friends whom looked for me where lied upon, I contacted them
Within the first signs and he convinced them I was allucinating.

He then contacted my family, my mother and sisters that somehow had this jelaousness sinnce
My first business, when I was 21 I opened my first place, while at that age there wheresitting in the computer I purchased for them at telmex, sadly doing nothing and looking upon
My accounts over Etsy to see how many bucks I was making... making accounts.

They started helping that guy, they followed his behaviors, they did not care aboutmy bruises,
About the hole he made on my knee, about the pledges I make them, and they loved there
And saw besides "pretending" doing something in the computer (they where aware he liked adults  things), they never tried or helped me out taking him out, and taking me to a good and proper psycologist, someone whom understood "pregancy depression" to start with and "abortion" and aso
"Domestic violence" and "bullying techniques".

I was only a puppet, one who worked answered emails, was yelled upon, was in charge of everything,  and he, or them will just have fun when I got angry.
I got angry for valid reasons.

I asked him many times to leave, he Carlos Rodriguez Mercado or also know as Carlos Hocker never left, he after putting me a broom in the neck after packaging al Mexican dresses or hitting me at the san pancho beach, before I had to buy a bracelet for a Facebook address order, I will ask him to leave, I will try to confront him, and I did, gaining more violence against me.
He was suppose to be a smart guy, but his intelligence was used then to contact my sisters and jist say to the "she is bipolar", they got in, I had bruises I ask them for help and they did nothing. They instead helped him, the years passed and the abusive behavior continued, they kept my money a in paypal for some bags I never sold and some other situations like Carlos they never resolved.

They allowed him to abuse from me, I asked for help many many times even before the abortion, and they just said "dont you use condoms?", I mean he did not and He put me in heavy meds that where affected by pregnancy pills, but how you explain that to them? With that andwer when you just said you have a baby in your belly, and need help?

Years went by, years of violence and I arrived to a place where I realized via Internet that al times they "helped" him put me away, besides from him "been alone and with a sad face", they will move legal stuff for the things my father left, as in Mexico if you are crazy you do not have any right to your heritage.

They will say stuff as you will never be so skinny as you where once, like if I cared, they will force me to work after al those years me, helping them, they never provide (until today) an single dolar for me eating or for my healing process, they will go on vacation with their friends and request me just when they wanted a babysitter or someone to entertain their kids.

(Typos? I am on my phone)
My sisters ending telling the police I was "so emotional" I hit her kids, which is a false statement and is illegal to lie to the police, I got angry, I called the police and the Violence system in Hermosillo sonora and they did nothing, they did not stop them.
They feel with so much power above me, due all the "clinic" stuff they got from Carlos, that even me going to doctors in the USA, them knowing I was fine they contacted my customers from Aida Coronado, and even friends whom contacted them years ago to never receive a response with statemenst about me that where also false and Not true.



How do you stay and see and listen an abuser when all you have to do is help to prevent a death.

In the case of my sister Chary, she even called me and I answered thinking she was going to apologize and she said "quit contacting carlos hocker, he is with someone since years ago, he even has children now, so he is going to keep all your stuff", for me that was a surprise, as 7 months ago he was still asking me for money, even when he crashed Etsy when not resolving customer orders and not programming shipping dates, he never did that... but when I said, hey guy you are been unfaithful your frustration talks for it self he would get very mad as in very angry and yell at me hurtful stuff as my Paranoia was out of place.

Dont this people understand they hurt you?
And besides that they will make you less aware and more prompt to abusers?

They should stay away and never contact or attempt to help, what was their help worth all those years?

For me they just where into they own interests.
Telling others driving a notice so cold like that, "that they knew already" makes a helping him t continue abusing from me a non sense I want to stay away for ever and never come back to places where violence means "getting worried" and not acting before to provide solutions.

In a world where is inherent that woman stay quiet and man ask for help and do what they want,
Will you continue quiet?
Will you raise your children to cope with the abuse,  My dad did not allow abuse,
He showed me to tolerate it but not to be abusive back, and all I know is I have to leave from that,
Cuz trying to make a guy understand is not ok to "abuse a woman" "even if she deserves it"
Because of her clothing, because of her attitude towards your own violence, is just nuts...

That is a game that is a society play not just a "responsibility of the author".
The familes, friends and neighboors are responsible for allowing abusers, the communication media,
The people around those situations, so instead of "doing a surprise face" or "stunishing" because what happened then, well
Train people, society to act when they see an "abusive behavior" so things fo not escalate.

For me this days with all above I keep working,
And besides al natura things hapening and God sending me to woman
Who is even abused economically or with hot oil, or with "emotional violence" with false statemenst about them selfs and even "threatened to be hit if they continue speaking", still makes me think, among all that bad things that
Happened to me, I am strong and able to be at least a word, a woman who is there at least telling
Them YOU COUNT WITH ME.

While all this happens a Country is in reconstruction.
I hope this also gets reconstructed.

Thoughts of Tuesday.

And me? As always continue working,
Like and employee of my company with all my heart,
Because I am a piece of that, of Mexico.

And You?
Who you are?


Me?
This are my statements
And I believe on them,
I believe in Free People as in Free Woman
As in freedom of speech.







Sunday, September 3, 2017

Hablando del Abuso

A veces me pregunto si la paz interior es algo que traemos por ende, o lo que nos rodea nos da paz?

Yo creo que es un poquito de ambos, pienso que para tener paz necesitas expresarte y las personas a tu alrededor respetarte.
He vivido sola y cuidado de mi por casi 15 años y existe un común denominador en este tiempo,
Que Yo no tolero, el abuso.

Humillar a una mujer, querer controlarla, limitarla, subestimarla y criticarla sin aportar nada bueno,  se me hace de lo más bajo.
He conocido gente de muchisimas clases sociales y muchos ven el defenderte como "un conflicto"
Los que opinan esto, pues mas bien "ya se vieron" usando-Te, o bien Usando algo tuyo que a ellos les conviene.

El abuso se puede dar desde tu pareja, tu madre como platicaba aquella vanidades de las madres que critican a sus hijos por envidiar su juventud, y querer ser como ellos, en esta revista Vanidades este tema trataba muy a fondo el abuso de un ser querido disfrazado "de preocupación" tal vez lo leiste,
Un comentario bueno que se vuelve una accion hiriente y como la juventud no sabia defenderse de sus propios seres queridos, puede ser tu amigo, tu amiga, hasta un niño que solo ha visto esto en su vida puede querer abusar de ti.

Yo creo que al
No vivir esto con mi padre, y el enseñarme a tolerar los abusos de mi madre y sus hijas, pero andar sola por el mundo me
He podido dar cuenta de ciertos patrones en las personas, es raro que alguien te busque si una intencion, todos necesitan algo, y nosotros somos buenos consejeros, tal vez por haber vivido mas situaciones, pero a veces si noto como nosotros permitimos el abuso a nuestro ser, en reclamos, y tipicos "yo te dije", yo deje de decirlo, hace mil años, por que mi Papa me preguntaba, "bueno... si y a final que hiciste?"

Me he decidido a investigar que es el abuso, quien es el abusador, por quenlo hace y con que finalidad, e ire publicando de que va este tema.

Es importante concientizarnos de esto, yo si escuchara a alguien, o viera a otro abusar de una persona Yo si diria algo, pero esa soy Yo. Tal vez me gusta "llamar la atención" pero para algo bueno.
Llamar la atención para efectuar un cambio, de raciocinio.
Si invirtieramos 5% del tiempo de "nuestros fisico" "apariencias" en realmente estudiar nuestro alrededor, y APORTAR algo con nuestro comentario, no seria este un "Mundo Feliz?"

Y dicen que todo lleva tiempo, y a mi me tomo tiempo darme cuenta que soy un ser humano,
Y para mi, importan temas que para Ti, tal vez son irrelevantes, o carecen de importancia.
Hace 10 años en Internet en Mexico no habia casi nada bordado, ninguna Iniciativa Mexicana que expresara de manera unica, su vision, y de manera autentica ayudara a Comunidades Indigenas a difundir su Arte y sus Artistas.
Algunos andabamos cerca de otros y los que Yo admiraba ahora no se donde andan, pero ellos sabe  quienes son en este mundo feliz.

Yo admiro personajes, unicos, un poco locos comunicativos demas, youtubers, personas freelancers con maneras de vivir alternativas, bloggers y fotografos con puntos de vista diferentes.

Rara vez opino mal de un ser, creo que tengo una manera paciente y positiva de ver la vida, y si me
Expreso de otra manera es por que perdi la paciencia y ahora me toca a mi, y normalmente esa persona no aguanta "la vara, con la que midio", no es por vengarme, pero tampoco soy Gandhi o la madre Teresa, para no defenderme.

Pero bueno opinar si otro esta loco o no, eso No lo hago, por que Yo no lo tengo enfrente, y asi como puedo emitir el juicio, tampoco doy mi opinion, si no quiero saber nada de esa persona y no ayude para nada cuando se me pidio ayuda, tal vez no pude estar, pero si estuve y vi sus actitudes normalmente me callo, hasta que Por necesidad tengo que decirlo.

Me hubiera gustado muchisimo, alla en Nayarit fuera diferente, pero no se si ppr el ejido y el dinero que acarrea a los poblados como sayulita, o la manera en la que nosotros Mexicanos vemos como se comporta la juventud extranjera y queremos imitarles  (cosa imposible por las diferencias culturales).
Vi mucha violencia de Genero, Abusos y Corrupcion, Yo no se que me sorprende tiene el segundo Lugar en Violencia, y tristemente Sonora el primero.

Como mujer te callas el abuso, y cuando hablas de el, en mi caso no sali de un "ya te dije".

Asi que decidi hacer lo que hacia y emplear mi conocimiento en algo de utilidad,
Por algo fui a la escuela no?, yo no iba a la universidad de Sonora a perder el
Tiempo, Yo tenia un compromiso conmigo misma.
A Duras penas hablaba con alumnos, me parecian muy preparatorianos sus temas,
Y hasta infantiles, yo queria jugar ajedrez, hablar de temas sociales, de importancia.
No de la casa de, el novio de, la fulana que, "es bien, dice tal, bla bla... esos temas para mi, son y seran irrelevantes"
Y eso no se si es unico, pero por lo menos me hacia feliz, tratar de ver la vida
De una manera diferente, y decir "desde mi experiencia personal opino:"
Asi que... a
Poner a trabajar ese conocimiento oldie.

Esta investigacion es como las mils que tengo en mi correo,
Asi empezaba a investigar, 30 pantallas abiertas,
30 URL leer todos y formularte un juicio,
Para entender el tema, puedes contar tu historia personal o bien hacer
Un reportaje 100% objetivo.

El Abuso Psicologico y Fisico en Mexico
Que hacer, Como actuar? Y Que es
Quien lo realiza?
Quien Lo encubre?

Investigación:
El abuso psicológico no está tipificado como delito. El Código penal sólo lo considera delito si existe violación (artículo 265). Sin embargo, “el abuso psicológico puede generar serios daños a la víctima como sensación de inutilidad, temor, torpeza, insomnio, neurosis, bipolaridad, paranoia, depresión e incluso suicidio”, refiere el experto.

En los últimos cinco años “testificamos cómo el abuso emocional puede tomar distintas formas. Así existe dependencia emocional, dependencia económica, negligencia emocional y/o física, abuso de poder, abuso intelectual, abuso sexual emocional y abuso cultural por mencionar los casos más frecuentes”, dice Manrique.

Fuente 1.- http://www.sinembargo.mx/07-04-2013/577969

Como actuar:
Que Hacer,
Fuente 2.-https://m.facebook.com/notes/porque-somos-bonitas-somos-cabronas-por-cabronas-nos-dicen-mamonas/que-hacer-ante-un-caso-de-violencia-intrafamiliar/518508231496139/?__tn__=H-R

Que es:
Fuente 3.-
prometiendo

Y se encubre

http://www.tuotromedico.com/temas/violencia_en_pareja.htm

........


Para poder verter  o dar  una opinion o historia que aporte algo nuevo, soluciones a problemas viejos,
Hay que leer del tema.
Metodologia

Sonora 1er lugar de violencia intrafamiliar o abuso a la mujer.
Nayarit 2do lugar en violencia intrafamiliar " idem"

Por que es de importancia?
Puedes vivir engañado de que en "tu sociedad" no pasa,
Tal vez en tu circulo social, en tu casa no suceda,
Pero tu hijo, hermano, primo, amigo
Lo puede vivir en unos dias o en 100 años
Si este se erradica y tipofica
Esta sociedad,  El mundo globalizado por el Internet,
Acabaria y Daria con muchos traumas y en mi opion
Se Podrian Prevenir muchos actos ilícitos e insolitos y otros
Donde la mujer termina con daños irreparables o hasta muerta.

Por que Como mujer no te puedes defender?
O cual es la explicacion logica para qur Sociedades
multiculturales como lo son Nayarit y Sonora
Presencien el acoso, abuso, bullying infantil, hostigamiento,

(esta va por lo que me
Pasaba en El "instituto vanguardia de hermosillo)
Violaciones fisicas y a la derechos humanos
Sin que los Mayores, Maestros, Sociedad, Comunidad,
o las Autoridades
hagan Algo Util al respecto.

Si algo se hace, esto se erradica y la sociedad
Trabaja como tal, se entiende a este tipo de alumnos,
Sensibles y vulnerables y se da la atencion necesaria
Al Abusador, no solo a la "victima" una vez ya traumado sus capacidadez mermadas.

Y nosotros que hacemos?