Knowadays I feel like every day is a new day, but sometimes I had fear
Of my own family.
I start understanding, that when my father died, my family died,
Jorge Salinovich Coronado, my Papa, was my -all for me-
He was my everything, he would make the rest of my family
Treat me with respect, he would answer my questions, take care oof me,
And even be a friend, and sometimes I will borrow money from him.
I was scared about a guy, so different to the man I saw as a example,
That he knew he was not good enough to be with me, that attempeted
To control me, leaving me as a working woman with no self
Expression. He would treat me like nothing but ask for all.
As the fear he once felt when he lost his mother, and father at the
Same time was at the moment covered by that family once
Unknown, those who laughed, like he did about online businesses.
Today, I am no longer around that abusive humans, and I hope kne day,
That guy Carlos Hocker learns to ask not for forgiveness but for
Knowing the life as it is, in life you take risks by your own,
Not with another people.
I wish my the rest of my family and those friends I stopped talking
To years ago, not because I did not loved them, but because I found
I no longer had anything in common with them, have beautiful lifesvery far away from me.
I can be ok, or under the eyes of people with a different point pf view
I could be called crazy, in other countries girls there are tons of woman like me.
That woman succeded not because they heard, "you can't"
"You are not enough", "do it this way".
They are succesful because they did things in their own way.
For years I feel I have been lost trying to ask for forgiveness,
To comply with a role which was not mine.
He, the man I admire, was a guy once, he had fun, he was rebelious,
He did things in a different way to set the example to their brothers and sister,
To their friends, he was a student of life.
He was loyal, caring, he also had a bad temper, and was
Very sensitive, I have a strong character that hides in sweet manners,
And a always smiling face, but when I am serious or I get angry,
That genes arise, not many people know me that way, just my
Real friends and him, he also thought me to work in my patience.
My Dad passed away 9 years ago, I saw him in his last birthday,
But that Christmas Holidays I stayed in what was my home as
A tourist for 10 years, Nayarit, a place I do no longer want to
Live in.
Mexico sometimes dissapoint me, Mexico still does not
Defend or take care of their artists and artisans as it should,
Mexico es una potencia, but we have a bad administration.
Because we take care of things that are less important.
My Dad was a believer of art, he would encourage me to learn
Technology and to learn english, I know he would be amazed
To see all the beautiful things I have done with Mexico Art
All this years.
September 7 is very close and I know he is happy, and lunita,
Margarito and mi tios are with him, along my Mama Maria.
My Grandmother, Maria Coronado, a strong woman whom raised
6 man and 1 woman to be a example to follow.
She was alone very young and my father was her right arm,
He dropped school at a very young age to work.
Jorge Salinovich Coronado was even bullied do this, because
He would learn new ways of talking with working people,
But he also learnt about vintage techniqurs he brought to a new life
In agriculture, he made lines in the soild and they had to be straight
Because one reason.
One day I know we will reunite, and one day I wish him
To receive me there and let me talk until he gets so bored,
He starts talking about him too.
He would barely talk, he would never hug me, but when he did
I knew I had to listen and when he did I cherish that moment for a
Long time.
September is almost here, then October, and November,
His birthday, My birthday, more happiness to see with beautifl weddings
To come along, amazing fiestas to discover Mexico culture,
Sorry I write about him so much but He was my everything.
My Mama Maria would say he was his little boy and I would
Tell her, Mama he is my big boy now, he takes care of us.
I had the opportunity of traveling with both several times,
He went to the USA to check on my Mama (grandmothers)
Health, and then we would stop to have a bite, to shop, to sleep,
She would put me in her lap and tell me stories when my Dad was
Young.
My Dad would pretend he was sleeping, but he had his cheeks
Very pink which meant he was hearing and a smile in his lips
Which meant he was happy.
Even when he was angry at me I would know he was still nothat angry because
I could see a smile upon her eyes, the most beautiful eyes of
All the world, brownish greenish very light beautiful eyes,
Eyes with knowledge, of guy who had seen many, had spoke
With many, had lived so many adventures, a man, who decided
To be a father of a girl, and never expected he to be different,
A father with respect to her daughter and a love I can still
Feel, this is his business and that is why I try to make it as he told
Me, that is why I do it with respect for all my clients,
Because I borrowed his last name, and he just showed
Me how to do things with love,
And how one day I will understand why, how come,
And all my questions in and for life.
Sometimes I miss him, I miss my room, sitting by the window,
Staring at the sky writing and writing so much, reading so many books
He would encourage me to seek in LibroLandia, and
Wondering if one day I could be a writer.
And realizing I was too young to share what I have learnt.
I miss all those writings because is always fun to ser what you worte
And is also encouraging, but you know?
You can always loose all and create a new life.
That, Is another thing I learnt from him.
And complain a bit, so much that you can learn from it,
And so much you never do that to others you Love.
My Dad showed me many ways, my Dad stayed until I was
Barely independent, It was very scary, and I wished I had been Alone
Because I know Alone I could have raised my self with out having
To be "like others" supposed I was.
I am a girl, a grown up one, that wishes things
Not many want, a woman who thinks a bit different,
And a gal who believes in good for all, and among that
Sometimes she forgets herself.
But that is her, and changing a good thing,
For a conventional way, just for making others happy
Well is as I asked you to change a bad thing you have for
Three good things.
I prefer to mantain my one good, and let you decide
When you leave.
Or if you stay and continue your harm,
Try not to touch up the good in me,
Because that is what makes us unique.
The Good
Random words, about life, my life,
Which is my business. Just mine.
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